Up until you have SOS you should spend 51 points into the lord development tab as follows
After this point you will switch to the war tab and path through to battle flag II as fast as possible picking up archers or mages (whichever you spec)
This will look like this
After you have achieved this point and pre lord level 35 (SOS) you should fill in where missed in the war tab and then proceed through infantry.
I will make separate articles for SOS (lord level 35) and slaughter skill (lord level 44).
This path will provide you with the optimum lord attributes pre SOS.